Admitting when we are wrong is one of the hardest things we do in this life.
Admitting to our inadequacies is even tougher.
I believe there is something in our innate humanity that drives us to seek answers by our own hands, our own capabilities, and our own minds. We find pride in doing so. Pride in working out problems on our own and doing it by our own will. Pride in knowing we ARE the rulers of our life and we rejoice in that accomplishment. We can do anything if we simply put our minds to it and have the will to see it through.
Here is the truth: we will always fall short. We, as human beings, will never have the answer or solution to any of our life’s problems. Sure at times it can appear that we do but not long after do we realize our answers are merely a temporary solution to a permanent problem. This truth is a hard pill to swallow. This truth goes against everything we are taught and conditioned to believe from this world. However, there is hope.
Jesus is our hope.
For many reading these words an immediate dismissive eye roll and an immediate rejection of this truth follows. This is the part where I, the author of this article, gets condemned as a “Jesus Lover” or “Bible Thumper” or “Radical”. These condemnations I won’t deny. Although, I am at the first steps in my journey to living a life by his word and building my personal relationship with God I hope to fully live up to the names of “Radical” and “Jesus Lover”.
Despite what you may be thinking right now, I am not here to “preach” but only to share. Share in my worldly experiences and give testimony to how I made it out the other side to finding Jesus again. When I say “I’ve experienced the world”, I mean to tell you that I have lived a life of a drunkard, a drug user, and as a participant in debauchery in hopes to satisfy the culture I so wanted to be apart of, just so I didn’t feel so alone. The most shocking about this is that no one in my life truly knew how desperate I was to feel whole and rid of all my regret in life because on the outside I looked like a moderately “put together” person (university educated, employed, good family, engaged to be married, etc).
There are several turning points I can say attribute to turning back to God’s Love and at every one of these points I had to surrender. I had to admit I did not have the answers. I had to admit I was lost without God in my life. This began my journey of surrendering. Everyday I choose to surrender and it is no joy ride, let me tell you. My stubborn pride gets in the way EVERY single day. So, everyday, I try my best to surrender my own will and instead lean on his will and find peace in accepting his Love.
Have you considered surrender?